“You drive like the insipid whelp of a week-dead jellyfish. Grow some vertebrae or get out of the passing lane.

Love and kisses,
~the woman trapped behind you

I am an idiot savant. Or, at the very least, I am an idiot.

Took my assessment test at ACC yesterday. Apparently, I am brilliant as a reader, writer and English grammatical person. Math? Yeah, not so much. The counselor damn near patted me on the head as she said*, “Ah, its OK! You can do better, right? Everybody has a hard time with math! There, there.”

Long story short — my degree plan only requires 1 (count ’em, ONE) college-level math course. But, I failed the math assessment SO bad that they are recommending** that I take TWO Math:Basic courses (I feel like a Rifts character) before attempting the one that I actually require.


Anyone wanna tutor me? I will trade one home cooked meal a week for a couple hours of “what in the heck does that mean?”

My head hurt so bad yesterday that I considered whapping it into into a brick wall to get some relief. But, I persevered. And took ALOT of Excedrine. Long about midnight, it finally relented. ahhhh…its done Or so I thought. I was figuring that it was a combination of stress and not eating until 2PM. But, damn if I didn’t wake up with another headache this morning.

Anyone wanna rub me?

*- I am paraphrasing. But, not by much.
** – where “recommending” = requiring
** – the Alfred Hitchcock theme song. I have some decidedly odd music.

21 thoughts on “*vzzzzzzzzzzzzTHOCK*

  1. What does ACC consider “college level math?” I do have my Princeton Review training under my belt and could perhaps be of some help if I really understood where you were (remember that I went to a snob college where “basic” math was calculus…)

      1. Well, the more basic stuff I probably could help you with. Amusingly enough, I failed algebra 3 times when I was actually taking it, and learned it when I was teaching Montessori. 🙂

  2. I wish we lived closer , I could totally help you. Math is kinda my “thing”. I mean … I do fine in the english classes and what not … but my spelling and punctuation continue to be spell-check absoluetly needed kind of thing.

      1. haha, thanks 🙂 i think my preferred drink is a red bull (or any number of energy drinks) on the rocks. yeah, i’m an engineering student!(hence the calculus bent)

  3. If you were closer I’d love to help. (My degree is in astrophysics so I’ve done a little math.) I can try and offer support remotely but I don’t know how much that can help you.

    1. I’m thinking that, yeah. Astrophysics would *require* some math.

      I theeenk that I have the whole “jesus crispies, MATH!” tutelage covered. If I have really, really complex problems with it though – I will write you!

  4. I had the same exact problem with math. In fact, I avoided all math classes for the first year of college because I didn’t want to take two remedial classes.

    When I went back several years later… I begged for a highschool algebra textbook off of freecycle, studied it for a week, and took the test again.

    So, I only ended up having to take ONE remedial math class. Yay.

  5. Been in the same boat there…

    I made a 39 on the TCOMP when I took it back in the day. However, I was able to get away with only requiring the Math component for Psychology (one class, which I took at UT), and a remedial math class.

    The one I chose involved Connect the Dots for the first six weeks, and something similar for the remainder of the class.

    It was giggle worthy.

    1. Re: Been in the same boat there…

      The one I chose involved Connect the Dots for the first six weeks, and something similar for the remainder of the class.

      THAT’s the class that I want.

  6. I’ll have to remind myself about a thing or three, and scheduling might be rough, but I can get the skills into your brain like nobody’s business. I have the mad teaching skills. Let me know if you still need help in this area.

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