- Name of Reporter: Bon Steele
- Version or Build: Unknown, no backend documentation provided with build
- Module or component: Female, uterine and associated bits
- Platform / Operating System: Human
- Type of error: Design Flaw
- Priority: Major
- Severity: High
- Status: Entered (again)
- Summary: Intermittent Hardware Issues Across Multiple Platforms
- Description: Varied behaviors across different platforms. [Please see Defect Behavior.]
Design Flaw Report
Intermittent Hardware Failure(s) Across Multiple Platforms
Steps to reproduce vary according to platform. Some users are reporting a 28-day cycle with regular and reproducible errors. Other users are stating that the defect happens sporadically, with no fixed pattern. We also have reports where the defect happens in a continual manner.
In these instances, the user often requires a patch to maintain normal functioning.
DEFECT BEHAVIOR
- Fluid leakage
- Occasional detritus, in some cases
- Discomfort within the main system
- In many cases, pain at a 6 or better has been reported.
[Please see accompanying diagram.]
- In many cases, pain at a 6 or better has been reported.
- Accompanying failures of systems
- Intestinal is the most reported
- Discomfort and/or malfunction of critical systems
- Headache
- Muscle fatigue and/or pain, often at a 4 or better.
[Please see accompanying diagram.]
- Endocrine and/or hormonal fluctuations
- These can create a multitude of issues including (but not limited to):
- Irrational behavior
- Unstable fuel consumption
- Chassis covering eruptions
- Interrupted down time or broken sleep functionality
- These can create a multitude of issues including (but not limited to):
RECCOMENDATIONS
We recommend pulling this functionality from production until these issues have been resolved.
PAIN DIAGRAM
The Process 
excellent.
🙂
Awesomeness.
Not for nothing did I work as a QA Engineer for all those years!
Ouch. But very impressive post. 🙂
😀
I have an impressive resume of stuff like this!
Well… I did ask you to share.
There is a TMI warning!
I am a stubborn badger, grumbling merrily along and whistling as I go.
Your defect report has been submitted to BugZilla and has been assigned to an engineer for analysis. Your defect report number is 3.0348259348 E19
please attend the bug scrub meetings regularly.
HA!
Thank you. 😀
If you could send me an invite to the scrubs via Outlook I’ll add them.
self-respecting engineering teams shun Exchange. the invite shall be sent via sendmail and vi. and a post-it note. it is also Hawaiian Shirt Day. TPS reports have a new cover sheet — did you get the memo? I’ll send you copy of the memo.
Your bug has been returned as “NEEDSMOREINFO”. We are unable to reproduce the problem. Please include the frequency of the issue. Also consider flushing your cache, deleting your preferences, rebuilding your desktop, and zapping your PRAM. And maybe some chamomile tea.
*snerk*
And voila! We have the reason that I left QA and went in search of Something Else.
There’s something outside of QA? Ohmygawrd I’ve been doing this for way the hell too long.