This morning was amusing in a slapstick sort of way. My matress is currently on the floor as I don’t have the dollars to buy or build a bed frame. Its low on my priorty list most days but this morning made me reconsider that.

Picture this….lo, there is Mare. She is sleeping in her comfy bed. Blankets are piled up and around her. Indeed, only her nose is poking out into the cool air of the bedroom. If this looks like a setup of some sort, you would be right. Even now, her evil cat is plotting….

In strolls teh Macha. 20+ pounds of furry, kitty love with a blat for a meow and a sewage system Cleveland would be horrified to own. See the kitty o’doom approach the bed – surely breakfast or pettin’s are on her mind.

Oh, looks like it might be pettin’s. She’s headed for the owner’s face. She scrunches down, nose to nose with owner. She pauses there – possibly to savor the moment. And then…”BLLLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!” she bellows into the gently reposed face.

I kid you not people, I leapt about four into the air from a prone position. I thought my heart was gonna stop. But, that’s not the end of the fun. Oh, no. First, there was the meaty thud of my landing. The cat gave me a *look* and froze. I scrambled up and attempted to lurch towards the bedroom door.
You see this coming, don’t you?
Yeah, I then proceeded to trip over the lump of kitteh on the floor. She somehow tangled between my feet and down I went, face first. *whump*
I bet my neighbor think I lead a far more interesting life than I actually do.

Will you give it to me?
Will you take the pain I give to you?
And, will you return it?

Its been a *very* odd kind of day. I’m not sure what to make of it all. I think I am still processing alot of it.
Emotional roller coaster is an *understatement*.

But I will say this: Its a happy sort of odd.

And no, its not what you think.

I’ve got a metric ton of work to do today. There’s so much that I cannot get a handle on exactly where to start. And just to make things interesting – my period started. Yeah, a freaking week early. I’m blaming the recent lunar eclipse. It’s either that or the lessening of stress in my life means that I am moving from a 45 day cycle to a more “normal” one.
Which of course, makes my imagination run wild with images of my ovaries being the Infinite Improbability Drive from the Hitchhiker’s Guide series.

WOMB: *SPLOOGE*
ME : WTF? *consults digital watch, verifies date and then looks at abdominal region in some dismay* What is going on down there?
WOMB: Five to one against and falling…four to one against and falling…three to one…two…one…probability factor of one to one…we have normality, I repeat we have normality.
ME: Oh, fuck you.