*taps the mic* This thing on?

ahem

First in international news…
People who are freaking out about the whole “they are cheatin’ us; we ain’t gettin’ our gold deeewwwwsssss!!!”.

S. T. F. U.

Now for national news,…Bob?

BOB: Thanks, Mare. Today, we’d just like to share some of the headlines that made us sit up and say, “Oh, fuck you.” First, this one:
McCain not sure how many houses he and wife own . I wonder if he even gets that he is supposed to represent all social classes if he is elected?

MARE: GIve the dinosaur man a break, Bob. He probably just forgot due to the dementia.

BOB: Right you are, Mare! Next, you secretly suspected – now know for sure! All food, by its very nature, is organic. That organic label only means that it was grown without pesticides. However, as most of those pesticides are incredibly expensive, you granola-freaks don’t need to worry. Thanks to those pesky oil prices, you aren’t going to be able to afford to eat for a long, long while.

MARE: Unless you are John McCain.