update du jour

How The Evening Went: An Ode (mostly) in Onomatopoeia

~ Bon Steele ~ 4 Comments

zzzZZZzz
*sneaksneak*
SPROING!!
mmph! EEE! FLING! THWACKO!
OWWW!

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
The Moral of the story?

Sneaking up and snuggling your mostly asleep girlfriend is fine if:
A.) She doesn’t startle easily
B.) You haven’t had a recent (within the last few hours) flu shot that has made your arm very sore.

~ Bon Steele ~ 7 Comments

Have fetched The Teen. She is having a cuppa joe and watching me type this. 🙂 So far, none dead. We’ll see how the zombie invasion goes, though.

😀

At any rate, I am trying to come up with “age appropriate”, *snort, laugh* activities for us to do. I am thinking the Drafthouse, at the very least. May take her to Casino El Camino for their rocking tomatillo-cheese-black pepper fries. What do you all think? Anything else?

Spent from 4:30 PM until *11* PM last night doing a quick turn around run to Waco and back.

I’ll let you ruminate on that.

The highway in Temple was shut the fuck down for a mile. Creamy Jesus on Crispy Crackers.

We sat for an hour on that stupid thing doing no more than 3 MPH – in separate cars, texting each other with random “WTF?” and “Dude, srsly?”

All is better now. Sleep and coffee put everything into perspective.

You Talking to *me*?

~ Bon Steele ~ 3 Comments

Fever blister is starting to heal, yay.
In the meantime however, it looks like I have the PLAGUE. Between it, the pirate-themed cami I am wearing and the fucked up weirdness that is my hair, I look like I belong in a biker bar somewhere. Someplace with a name like The Dew Drop Inn or The Pink Poodle. Names that *invite* you in to start some shit. Just so you can have your ass handed to you by a bunch of tattooed guys who collectively weigh more than Shamu.

MORON in off the street = MioS
BIKERS = BIKERS (*shrug*)

MioS : What a stupid name! What are ya? A bunch of sissies?
BIKERS: shocked silence…
BAR: sound of crickets…somewhere in the distance – a dog barks.
MioS : (realizing his mistake) Ohhhhhhfuuuuuu…
BIKERS: (leaping, en masse) *GROWL*
BAR : Johnny Cash comes back onto the jukebox, drowning out sounds of insurance premiums being shot skyward

At any rate and in keeping with the theme, I decided that I needed a biker name. Luckily for me, there’s an Outlaw Biker Name Generator. I am QUITE certain that it was designed by a *real* Hell’s Angel. Because as you know, most outlaw bikers are proficient with Java and web page design.
According to it my “one-percenter” name is “BITCH” and I ride with “Whiskey Priests MC”. You may now all bow down and grovel at Bitch’s feet. Don’t fuck up the boots while you’re down there.