— MIDNIGHT -_
ME: Feeling a touch sleepy plus I have a small ton to do tomorrow, some of it early. I will go to bed. But first I will finish the nifty conversation with Mister Man and see this clip* he was talking about.

— 2 AM —
ME: Crapses. That is not really what I intended to do! Furthermore, I am no longer sleepy. But I really have to get some rest. I will lay down and hopefully, once I relax and get comfy, I’ll just drift off.

BED**: Oh, you think so, do you? Moo ha ha ha.

BED: . . .

BED: Hm. I really need to work on my evil laugh.

— 2:45 AM —
ME: *snooze snooze snooze*

— 3 AM —
ME: *back cramps into new and exciting position* AWAKE, OW OW OW OW! Hot shower and Advil, to the rescue!

— 3:30 AM —
ME: *lightly snooze lightly snooze*

BED: GOTCHA!

ME: ARGH! Hip cramp! *flail*

ME: Oh, and btw. REALLY UNIVERSE?!?

ME: I’ll just hobble around the bedroom, hopefully quietly, until this passes.

— 4:00 AM —

ME: *toss turn toss* grrr rackin’ frackin’ farga’ rarga *toss turn*

BED: 🙂

— 5 AM —

ME: *gives up and takes a gulp of Children’s Benadryl*

— 8:30 AM*** —

PHONE ALARM: Boop! Boop! Twitter! Boop!

ME: *Charlie Brown frustrated yelp*

* – clip = Kevin Smith’s “Too Fat for Forty”, one of his Q & A seminars. And we wound up watching the whole thing. Because it was freaking hilarious. AND quite introspective. I came away with new respect for the writing process.

** – Our bed is evil. Perhaps because, over the years, we have managed to squash flat each and over coil. I don’t know. But it is like sleeping on a concave section of flinty ground.

*** – I wish that I was making this shit up.