Dear cop who followed me for blocks,
Yeah, you. Look asshole, I really don’t need *any* more stress in my life. I realize that while it is likely that you are simply doing your job, its equally likely that you are just getting your jollies by scaring folks. I was doing the speed limit. I was neither zigging nor zagging. The truck is street legal. There was absolutely no reason for your to swing in behind me and ride my tail.
And even though my sleep deprived brain cackled at the thought of tapping the brakes to warn you off my ass, I resisted. Although, if I had had access to them, I would have tossed a basket of life-like toy snakes through your window if I could’ve gotten away with it. Spread the “argh, what the fuck!” around, I always say.
Disgruntled,
~Mare
The Process 
Dear Mare,
Sorry, my bad. I’m wicked hot and muscley and just wanted to get your phone number and have sweaty copsex with you. Mea culpa.
Sincerely,
Coppy McCoppenstien
LOL
512-659-xxxx
🙂
Sweaty copsex? *snickers*
~~~~~
In all seriousness, why? Why would he have done that? I was actually doing the speed limit and being good. I noticed him swing in behind me while I was chatting with S and he followed me for about 6 blocks. Then swung off, did a U-ie and went the t’other way.
Re: LOL
I know dude, you don’t even look Mexican! Like not even a little!
He’s hoping you’ll do something that provides probable cause to stop you.
I’ve noticed cops tending to do that more and more when people are driving while on the phone.
Spread the “argh, what the fuck!” around, I always say.
lmao…
I admit…that was my favorite part, too.
🙂